In organizational behaviour, we are studing motivational theories. In order to assess our peers and our own motivational methods we were required to write a one-page story on a time where we were most motivated. I found after reading everyone else’s heroic tales of drive and endurance, that mine was rather fluffy. However, it is true and I still think i’m pretty cool. So that counts for something.
Getting off my couch
There is something very different about me today compared to the person I was two months ago. A side of me that I haven’t seen my entire life has begun to grow at a rapid pace. I’m a motivated, driven person who is taking on the very maximum I can chew, and I never thought it could make me so happy.
The summer was probably my absolute lowest point of motivation. I was melted onto the couch, eating chocolate for lunch, playing on a Neopets account (a game I used to play when I was 11). I’d finally drag myself off to go to a party in the evening, my social life being of utmost importance to me. I worked solitary shifts at a vintage store, where I would listen to music and draw pictures, occasionally talking to customers. Going nowhere, doing nothing, and completely content…or so I assumed. Everyone warned me about the heavy workload at BCIT and I told myself I was ready for it, though I have no idea how I could make that assumption with the way I was acting. I just knew that, like the caterpillar, I had been sitting dormant in a cocoon for so long, and it was coming time to burst out as a butterfly.
School started and instantly I was hunched over my desk taking notes and reading books. Homework started piling up and I quit going out as much, I quit drinking on weeknights and quit smoking. It was scaring me, I panicked a bit on the load I had taken on, but it was never too hard. I kept going with the flow and I was so surprised at the 180 I took. Once it all settled in I decided to take on more, and applied to be the resident photographer. Now it was school and a light workload. Once I got my first assignments I panicked again. When would I do my homework if I was covering events and editing photos all the time? It still wasn’t too hard. I just kept on it until my work was done, and it all worked out. Recently, I’ve begun working for a photography blog, which I have to contribute fashion, music or party photos at least twice a week. Now the panic was very evident, I had to sit down and have some tea to calm myself. This combined with extra photography I do for friends and bands occasionally I was really cutting out any spare time. I purchased a small datebook which instantly became completely full. Yet it all still flowed, and I could still handle it.
My mother is amazed I have a datebook. The person I was and the person I have become in the past two months are not even comparable. I found that I can take on responsibility, and can be an adult, and it’s not all stress. It’s rewarding, beneficial and making me very proud of myself. Who knows where I’ll be after two years.